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When earliest man discovered fire, he quickly learned that animal flesh was much tastier, cleaner, and easier to eat when cooked over a wood fire. In addition, he learned to add spices, salt and other flavorings to the flame roasted meat while he cooked it over an open fire. As with any endeavor pursued by the male of the species, you can easily see the inevitable competition growing over whose roasted meat would be adjudged the tastiest morsel. Hence, we see the evolution of grilling steaks in the back yard, competitive cook-offs, and tailgate parties.
Cooking outdoors was never a popular thing down on the Pore Farm in the ‘40s and ‘50s. The only time I saw it done was when we would get together with neighbors and go down to the river to fish, swim, and cook supper over an open fire. The ladies did the cooking. Come to think of it, I don’t think I ever saw my dad cook anything — ever. During that timeframe, about the only outdoor cooking I recall was pit barbecue. Dale Roark, Brock School Principal, was quite renowned for his expertise in pit barbecuing chickens and such. The meat would be wrapped in brown paper, wet toe sacks, packed in wet clay, and buried in a pit of glowing coals — as best I remember.
It was in the ‘60s before I tried my hand at grilling steaks and other such manly outdoor activities. I began with a cheap open grill made of sheet metal in which I burned charcoal briquettes. It was an OK starter, but it quickly rusted away. Finally by the mid-70s, I stepped up to a single burner Char-Broil gas grill — a Kmart special for $89.95 plus tax, American money. I replaced everything on it at least twice except the cast aluminum case, and if not for vanity, I’d probably still have it.
One thing missing in my life has been a man-sized wood burning smoker. I’m talking about one of those behemoths onto which you could throw a buffalo yearling. Traveling around extensively in the Navy, I was forced to forego such bulky toys. Since retiring, I’ve found that buffalo are in short supply so I have recently opted for a scaled-down gas smoker from Cabela’s. Rather than sitting around tending a wood-fired smoker most of the day and into the night with friends consuming large quantities of cold adult beverages, I prefer the convenience of a gas smoker. I can set the temperature and forget it, yet I can add wet wood chips in the pan above the burner to impart as much smoke flavor as desired.
Before I ruined my first piece of meat in my new Cabela’s smoker I consulted a few experts. I hemmed up two old friends, David Gilbert and Don “Duck” Shirley, one morning and gleaned two lifetimes worth of smoker expertise. From there I have an excellent basis from which to make my own mistakes.
I’ve had lots of fun trying various woods for distinctive smoke flavors, as well as a myriad of spices, rubs and seasonings. I strongly prefer to smoke briskets, ribs, and sausages, some of the unhealthiest cuts of meat possible, but as long as I take my cholesterol pill each morning, I’ll keep smoking that politically incorrect red meat.
Larry M. Jones is a retired Navy Commander and aviator who raises cattle and hay in the Brock/Lazy Bend part of Parker County. Comments may be directed to nowhearthis@pwhome.com.
Viewpoints
COLUMN: Holy Smokes!
- Viewpoints
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CNHI EDITORIAL: Seizure of AP phone records an insult to independent press
Distrust of government secrecy has been elevated to an exceptional level with the disclosure the Justice Department covertly examined two months of Associated Press phone records to determine who leaked details to the AP about a foiled terrorist plot.
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NOW HEAR THIS: ‘What we’ve got here is a failure to communicate’
This famous quote addressing communication failure is a classic line from the 1967 movie “Cool Hand Luke,” starring Paul Newman. Strother Martin, who played the role of the warden in a southern prison, would use this phrase every time he gave Luke a good whack with his baton. The concept resonated so well with moviegoers that it was voted No. 11 of the 100 all-time favorite movie quotes according to the American Film Institute.
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Letters to the Editor – May 19, 2013
Do you remember the “MISSION ACCOMPLISHED” sign that the personnel on the USS Abraham Lincoln displayed to greet President Bush when he went out to greet them?
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Guest opinion: Campaign with honor
All politics is local and personal! I hope that you and your family have a wonderful summer, filled with relationship building experiences and times of relaxation. As you do all the things that re-charge us for the next round at work and involvement in community and political activities, let’s reflect on the 2013 local elections for a moment.
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TISCIONE: Woe for calling evil good
You don’t often see “woe” used in an article. It’s a word that has fallen out of usage in our day. But it’s a word that ought to be understood and taken seriously.
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Letters to the Editor – May 17, 2013
As mercury pollution threatens our waterways and carbon pollution-fueled climate change worsens extreme weather, we need someone in Washington who knows how to get things done.
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Letters to the Editor – May 15, 2013
I just wanted to express my heartfelt thanks to the slobs, idiots and inconsiderate people who continually decorate the beautiful Texas landscape with their trash. I guess it’s really a form of art with beer bottles and cans, boxes, plastic drink containers, food packaging and just about anything else you can think of. It just doesn’t appeal to me. Thank you.
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NOW HEAR THIS: Not by the hairs of my chinny chin chin
I had never really considered this possibility, but every one of the Three Little Pigs was almost certainly a guy. I know that assumption is not particularly popular from an equal opportunity standpoint, but the fact is fairly certain. How do I know? They all three had hair on their chinny chin chins.
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ESTES: Securing a bright future for Texas
Texas businesses have created more than 500,000 jobs since November 2011. Our economy is growing nearly 50 percent faster than the rest of the country and our cost of living remains low.
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TISCIONE: ‘It’s not about me’
“It is good to give thanks to the LORD, to sing praises to your name, O Most High; to declare your steadfast love in the morning and your faithfulness by night.”
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